Russel P puts it wonderfully -Indians are so cheap, they invented zero - hilarious, painful and true. And if I could chime in - if Scrooge Mcduck were to start looking for a job in this big bad world, he would obviously want to be an Indian IT professional preferably working off -shore on-site.
As it always happens with anyone who wants to believe (firmly/badly/deeply) in something, I started noticing the trueness of the great 'cheap Indians' theory almost instantly. It is so damn intriguing that I just can't resist the temptation to share a yummy story with you all.
Cheap-o-ness: A very thin line separates the wise from otherwise. Cheapness, to me is simply being shamelessly cheap. So obviously there are way too many things that can get you tagged as a cheap-o. But it must take a nation of a billion people a lot of sincerity and dedication to teach this art tirelessly to the young work force of tomorrow. So that when it is time for the world to notice us, that's one of the first things they must admit (apart from the fact that these Indians are good at Maths!!!). Trust me, Indians are too large a population to be shodowed by one habit. And many Indians, like me, are nothing like this. But alas, little did we know that we shall be swept away by this unending stream of IT clones from the depths of god-knows-where in India. Not until they got the vague dubious gift of being the IT donkey force of the world. Not until somehow they began to think that they are the one big reason why today's world ticks n tocks. Nobody told them; or maybe they did - but there are no ears to hear - its all a sea of swelling egoes. As the Indian ITs took to the world, they left the shores with their mother's blessings and the gleamy armor of cheap-o-ness.
I am taking the onerous task of introducing you to this very special type of cheap-o-es.It's got to be a disease that's super contagious, almost pandemic, but limited to Indian Passport holders only, aged between 21- 33 yrs. Let's call the protagonist of our story "o". "o" is the typical dreamy eyed, sex starved, B.Tech Engineer from anywhere in India.
Believe you me - he has no clue what's about to happen to him.
As he finishes his engineering degree, he dreams of a good job with an IT firm. It's got nothing to do with what he studied, but obviously that's meaning less and futile. He can make his parents proud plus he's heard that life as an IT bachelor in Bangalore is way too much fun.
In the world of "o", it is his peers who define the race, and it is they who rank him? A vicious cycle of non-productivity as he endlessly searches for acceptance. It would imply that at large, "o" is unsure of his identity, of his ability and potential to stand out/stand alone.
I can imagine my IT friends reading this and going @!#@#$#@$.
An example follows:
- A small bunch of these brainy nerdy tech - super dudes are sent to lala-land to help a big corporate firm with its technology woes. - 1year project. To the trained IT eye and brain it means only one thing. Its the one big opportunity that he has been longing for. To go and work tirelessly, slog like a donkey and save up heaps n heaps of cash. Not just that - its a chance to test all the theories he has been waiting to implement.
- Almost instantaneously, mathematics takes precedence. He starts multiplying (lets say - by 40) to gauge price in Indian equavalent (which is obviously the only sacred measure of quality). Who the hell cares for a haircut at $12. That's around Rs. 500 (give or take the momentary fluctuation in the global currency market). That would mean, back in India, if he were to put aside that much amount for haircuts, he could have had "n" haircuts. Big dilemma, easy solution -- He cuts his own hair ---saves $12.
- They call each other friends, but its a race, a competition. Something they thrive on.
- The rules are simple. By the end of the 1 year project, whoever saves the most (converted in INR), gets the bragging rights, and the much needed 'respect in your peers eyes'.
- Cut throat competition is to follow. But realistically, its a new land, and everybody is equally fearful. So they form a group. The group makes the decision. Its the best result given the circumstances. All win.
- Amazingly, quality of life is valued by the bank balance.
- Most favorite time killer is to discuss strategies of minimizing overhead costs. To start with a rationale that there's a cheaper way to do everything, visit every place, live the cherished life.
- They would prefer living in a condo and sharing them with umpteen other peers as long as the per head cost comes down to feeling as if you were renting a suburban Mumbai 1 BR apartment.
(I personally believe part of this sad plight is to be blamed on our education system. Why did we have to mug mathematics so much that it runs in our blood.)
Anyways, so what's new in this story. Well as usual, one from the gang (my friend in this case) decides to betray the group values (how else would gang movies thrive?). He chooses to live in a better place and opt for a better life. He sacrifices the sacred money in pursuit of trivial pleasures....
....much to follow please keep reading
As it always happens with anyone who wants to believe (firmly/badly/deeply) in something, I started noticing the trueness of the great 'cheap Indians' theory almost instantly. It is so damn intriguing that I just can't resist the temptation to share a yummy story with you all.
Cheap-o-ness: A very thin line separates the wise from otherwise. Cheapness, to me is simply being shamelessly cheap. So obviously there are way too many things that can get you tagged as a cheap-o. But it must take a nation of a billion people a lot of sincerity and dedication to teach this art tirelessly to the young work force of tomorrow. So that when it is time for the world to notice us, that's one of the first things they must admit (apart from the fact that these Indians are good at Maths!!!). Trust me, Indians are too large a population to be shodowed by one habit. And many Indians, like me, are nothing like this. But alas, little did we know that we shall be swept away by this unending stream of IT clones from the depths of god-knows-where in India. Not until they got the vague dubious gift of being the IT donkey force of the world. Not until somehow they began to think that they are the one big reason why today's world ticks n tocks. Nobody told them; or maybe they did - but there are no ears to hear - its all a sea of swelling egoes. As the Indian ITs took to the world, they left the shores with their mother's blessings and the gleamy armor of cheap-o-ness.
I am taking the onerous task of introducing you to this very special type of cheap-o-es.It's got to be a disease that's super contagious, almost pandemic, but limited to Indian Passport holders only, aged between 21- 33 yrs. Let's call the protagonist of our story "o". "o" is the typical dreamy eyed, sex starved, B.Tech Engineer from anywhere in India.
Believe you me - he has no clue what's about to happen to him.
As he finishes his engineering degree, he dreams of a good job with an IT firm. It's got nothing to do with what he studied, but obviously that's meaning less and futile. He can make his parents proud plus he's heard that life as an IT bachelor in Bangalore is way too much fun.
In the world of "o", it is his peers who define the race, and it is they who rank him? A vicious cycle of non-productivity as he endlessly searches for acceptance. It would imply that at large, "o" is unsure of his identity, of his ability and potential to stand out/stand alone.
I can imagine my IT friends reading this and going @!#@#$#@$.
An example follows:
- A small bunch of these brainy nerdy tech - super dudes are sent to lala-land to help a big corporate firm with its technology woes. - 1year project. To the trained IT eye and brain it means only one thing. Its the one big opportunity that he has been longing for. To go and work tirelessly, slog like a donkey and save up heaps n heaps of cash. Not just that - its a chance to test all the theories he has been waiting to implement.
- Almost instantaneously, mathematics takes precedence. He starts multiplying (lets say - by 40) to gauge price in Indian equavalent (which is obviously the only sacred measure of quality). Who the hell cares for a haircut at $12. That's around Rs. 500 (give or take the momentary fluctuation in the global currency market). That would mean, back in India, if he were to put aside that much amount for haircuts, he could have had "n" haircuts. Big dilemma, easy solution -- He cuts his own hair ---saves $12.
- They call each other friends, but its a race, a competition. Something they thrive on.
- The rules are simple. By the end of the 1 year project, whoever saves the most (converted in INR), gets the bragging rights, and the much needed 'respect in your peers eyes'.
- Cut throat competition is to follow. But realistically, its a new land, and everybody is equally fearful. So they form a group. The group makes the decision. Its the best result given the circumstances. All win.
- Amazingly, quality of life is valued by the bank balance.
- Most favorite time killer is to discuss strategies of minimizing overhead costs. To start with a rationale that there's a cheaper way to do everything, visit every place, live the cherished life.
- They would prefer living in a condo and sharing them with umpteen other peers as long as the per head cost comes down to feeling as if you were renting a suburban Mumbai 1 BR apartment.
(I personally believe part of this sad plight is to be blamed on our education system. Why did we have to mug mathematics so much that it runs in our blood.)
Anyways, so what's new in this story. Well as usual, one from the gang (my friend in this case) decides to betray the group values (how else would gang movies thrive?). He chooses to live in a better place and opt for a better life. He sacrifices the sacred money in pursuit of trivial pleasures....
....much to follow please keep reading
1 comment:
As I was reading there was a voice from within me saying.....READ IT CAREFULLY IDIOT ITS YOUR STORY..:)
And suddenly i realized Ahhh yes..Thats me...Poor Indian IT male... Super stuff sir.... Waiting eagerly to read what happened next....
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